Adventure Idea, Help Requested (Warning Long Post)

[ozbonius_2000]

Greetings,
I am working on an Adventure for a CT Campain IMTU. I had a moment of inspiration and several moments of lag time at work, and now I've got the basic outline. I'm looking for ideas to fill in some of the scenes and a sanity check for plot holes. For instance, what type of intervention could be used. Assistance/Criticism from the masses would be greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance...

Precious Cargo

Overview (Players)

This adventure will take place on the planet Dratragh (UPP: A274543-9) in the Loren Subsector. The PC’s will be operating on a Far Trader. During a 5 day planet-side layover they will be contacted by an agent employed by Rashur-Inn, a prominent hotel chain throughout the system. They are headquartered in Ira, the city surrounding the starport. The agent, Miran Shira, is the personal assistant to Bana Rashur, the owner of the hotel chain. Shira will provide the following information to the PC’s.

Bana Rashur has recently learned of an assassination plot against himself and his only child, Gari. The assassination is to be carried out in 8 days. The assassin was hired by a rival hotel chain-owner, who hopes to buy up Rashur-Inn in the aftermath of the family turmoil. Because there is nothing but speculation, Bana is unable to obtain any assistance from local authorities. He is seeking the PC’s to determine the identity of the assassin and thwart his/her plans. Failing that, the PC’s are to transport Gari to Ygyng (UPP: A443644-B), the main planet in a system 1 parsec distance from Dratragh. Bana has a friend on Ygyng who will provide a hideout for his son. Gari is hiding out somewhere in Ira now and will contact the party to designate a meeting time and place. The PC’s contact information will be given him by his father once the party reaches Egim.

The rival hotel chain is Karanuk. It’s Headquarters are Egim, a large city about 800 Km from Ira. Shira will provide the PC’s transportation to Egim the following morning, and direct the party to contact him upon arrival. Should they learn any information regarding the plot or identity of the assassin, they are also to contact him immediately. If they learn nothing of use in 3 days, they are to return to Ira, and depart on schedule with Rashur’s son aboard the Far Trader.

Overview (Referee)

If asked, Shira will state that Bana himself is too old and feeble to travel, and plans to hire bodyguards. It is his hope that the bodyguards will thwart the attempt on his life, and apprehend the assassin, thereby incriminating the Karanuk chain-owner.

Also, if asked, Shira will state that Bana learned of the plot from an old business associate who is now the Operations Dept. Head at Karanuk. He accidentally overheard the owner (President), the Vice-President, and the Financial Officer in what they thought was a private meeting. He immediately contacted Bana to let him know of the scheme.

The Assassin hired by Karanuk is none other than Miran Shira. For his services he will receive, in addition to a hefty sum, partial ownership of the newly formed Karanuk-Rashur Hotel chain (A very small part). Shira will, of course, intervene and disrupt the PC’s investigation progress. He also plans to carry out the assassination of Bana during the three days that the party is in Egim, and well before Bana can assemble his bodyguards.

Bana and Gari are the only two who know the name and location of the friend on Ygyng, and Gari was told not to disclose the information to anyone. Gari is in hiding somewhere in Ira, and Shira will attempt to ascertain this information from the PC’s (After they are contacted by Gari), as well as the location and name of the friend on Ygyng. He will allow Gari to depart the planet with the PC’s rather than face a public confrontation that would incriminate him. If he doesn’t have the name/location at that time, he will attempt to land on Ygyng ahead of the party, and follow them.

Scenes will include the following: The Meeting; Transit to Egim; Karanuk Headquarters; Return to Ira; Departure; Arrival on Ygyng; and The Confrontation.

 

[tjoneslo]

Mega-plot hole #1: Unless the PC have spent a great deal of time on Dratragh, and in Egim in particular, travel to Egim will end up being a three day vacation. Karanuk CEO won't tell them anything, and may have the players arrested for harrasing them. The PC's don't have contacts in the underworld strong enough to dig out an assassination plot by a high-ranking CEO type.

Basically, as a PC, I can't see the point in going to Egim. The athorites in Egim don't belive the plot is real and can't tell me anything useful. I don't know anyone in Egim who would be willing to tell me anything.

My plan would be to have one of the PC delay Shira before we leave, kidnapp Bana and put him into the ship's locker. While the ships pilot has Bana in high orbit, we take the three day vacation in Egim, then come back, pick up Gari and fly off. If I'm asked to stop an assassanation, I'm not going off on what is so obviouly a wild good chase.

I'm stunned Bana Rashur hired, as his personal assisstant, someone with the temprement to be an assassin. Or if it was intentional, Bana hired someone who was that easily corrupted. I'm guessing that, in addtion to the fine reward offered, Karanuk's CEO is also blackmailing Shira. And, when the deal is done, Shira will quietly disapper.

I'm also stunned that if Bana knows his rival would (or even might) stoop to assassination, he hasn't already hired a dozen bodyguards. Generally if the business climate is such that assassination is part of the nature of doing buisiness, so is having bodyguards at all times. And if such acts are not usual, I can't see Bana hiring guards until after the point where the police get involved. Or the assassin has already tried once and failed.

Try this one: Karanuk's CEO has offered Shira a share of the company if she can convince Bana to sell, but by a certian date. Bana's refusing. The overheard converstion is a case of mistaken interpretation, is now third hand. Put Gari into this. He doesn't want to be a hotel owner, but rather an bohemian artist. He want's the inheritence to live on, and the friend on Ygyng is an artist colony. He's cooked up a few "accidents" which has made Bana somewhat paranoid. Shira is taking advantage of this, adding more "accidents". Her delays are why there are no bodyguards.

Shira hires the PC as bodyguards until they can leave. Shira need Gari around to frame for the murder/assassination of Bana.

The scenes are: Meeting with Shari, Meeting the Bana, The first accident, Finding Gari, the second accident, the trip to Ygyng, The unmasking.

 

[ozbonius_2000]

Mega-plot hole #1: Unless the PC have spent a great deal of time on Dratragh, and in Egim in particular, travel to Egim will end up being a three day vacation. Karanuk CEO won't tell them anything, and may have the players arrested for harrasing them. The PC's don't have contacts in the underworld strong enough to dig out an assassination plot by a high-ranking CEO type.

Basically, as a PC, I can't see the point in going to Egim. The athorites in Egim don't belive the plot is real and can't tell me anything useful. I don't know anyone in Egim who would be willing to tell me anything.

The General Idea was to have the PC's go to Egim and infiltrate the Karanuk Headquarters, searching the offices of the involved parties, in an attempt to find clues leading to the identity of the assassin.

Bana has 8 days until the attempt on his life will take place and he is hiring the PC's to do some detective work and transport his son to Ygyng. The body guards he hires will take care of thwarting the assassination attempt. Perhaps he is trying to keep everything low key to avoid unwanted Media Attention...

Perhaps Shira will lead the party to some underground contacts he knows to "help" (read as Interfere) with the investigation.

I'm stunned Bana Rashur hired, as his personal assisstant, someone with the temprement to be an assassin. Or if it was intentional, Bana hired someone who was that easily corrupted. I'm guessing that, in addtion to the fine reward offered, Karanuk's CEO is also blackmailing Shira. And, when the deal is done, Shira will quietly disapper.

Money can buy just about anything, including corruption... I really like the idea of blackmailing Shira. Or perhaps he has a rather large debt he needs to pay off to some highly undesirable persons.

I'm also stunned that if Bana knows his rival would (or even might) stoop to assassination, he hasn't already hired a dozen bodyguards. Generally if the business climate is such that assassination is part of the nature of doing buisiness, so is having bodyguards at all times. And if such acts are not usual, I can't see Bana hiring guards until after the point where the police get involved. Or the assassin has already tried once and failed.

Bana did not know of the plot against him, and this is not normal business practice. Once he learns of the plot he will hire body guards (Possibly another party of PC's). He is hiring the body guards since he can't get any assistance from the local authorities on just the word of an old business associate.

Thank you for the critique, tjoneslo. It looks like I still have some work to do in order to make everything seem plausible and flow smoothly.