Lightbulb Jokes

[ElliottWJames]

OK, lets start swopping some lightbulb jokes - you know the type of thing;

"How many Zhodani does..."

"It take to change a light bulb? I knew you were going to say that!"

 

[trader jim]

how many lightbulbs does it take to change a human????

 

[lesbates]

Originally posted by Elliott James:
OK, lets start swopping some lightbulb jokes - you know the type of thing;

"How many Zhodani does..."

How many employees of Famille Spofulam does it take to change a lightbulb?

"What! I'm not going in there! Ditzie's in there!"

or:

None, the place glows all by itself.

Les

 

[notagoodusername]

How many X does it take to change a lightbulb?

...Hiver?

None, you end up changing it without realising you have aided its plans.

...Solomani?

Who are you determine change citizen? Come with me...

...Aslan?

I don't know, ask a female.

...K'kree?

None, they don't use lightbulbs and none of you meateaters will need to change it if we wipe you out instead.

And finallly....

...TMLers?

All of them. One to change it, 75% of them to flame him for changing a lightbulb that has served them well for years, and the rest to de-lurk and say that they would never get involved with this type of discussion.

And a 'sorry' to all who read this - it was early!

Shane

 

[trader jim]

Hey Shane...do i dectect an underlieing dislike of lightbulb jokes with a touch of sarcasum???..
heheheheheh

great comeback.....

 

[DaddyDragon]

And one I've seen somewhere else, but can't remember where right now...

How many Droyne does it take to change a lightbulb?

Six, it always takes six.

Regards,
Larry

 

[far-trader]

Originally posted by DaddyDragon:
And one I've seen somewhere else, but can't remember where right now...

How many Droyne does it take to change a lightbulb?

Six, it always takes six.

Regards,
Larry

I've seen it too, I think it's a .sig from the TML but can't recall who's (or where it might have been before that).

Hmm, let's see, just for you Larry, off the top of my head mind so it's probably a little lame...

Q: How many Vargr does it take to change a lightbulb?

A: One charismatic leader and as many loyal pack members as he can command.

but...

...you really won't like the amount of random gunfire, unnecessary use of high speed open grav vehicles and howling associated with the 'aquisition' of the replacement lightbulb

 

[themink]

How many Vilani does it take..
Why change anything, it is performing in a decorous and stable manner.

How many Merchants does it take to change a lightbulb
3 <pause> fifty plus sales tax, plus the local goods tax, plus a service fee.

How many Tigresses does it take to change a lightbulb.
1, but only to change it into a glowing hole in the ground.

 

[s-feige]

And my all time favourite :

How many PCs do you need to change a light bulb?

Five.
One to screw in the bulb, and four to lay down covering fire...

Have a nice day.

 

[Vargas]

Newts:

"Lightbulb? Please go to Window 37 and ask for form A-32b, scratch out Question 60a(1) and initial the scratched out Question, take the completed form to Room 17-180 and get a Maintenance Permit Form with Supplimentary Questionaire. . ."

 

[Vargas]

Virushi:

Waits patiently for the lighbulb to change itslef.

 

[thedamnyankee]

How many Darians does it take to change a light bulb?

None, Our Highly advanced lightbulbs dont burn out. Wich is good, becuse no one remembers how to change them if we had to.

Christopher Schroeder

 

[GBoyett]

How many Solomani does it take to change a light bulb?

One to supervise a trusted nonhuman alien in doing this important work.

 

[Maspy]

How many Imperial Marines does it take to change a lightbulb?

....

 

[far-trader]

Originally posted by Maspy:
How many Imperial Marines does it take to change a lightbulb?

....

Ya mean like...

IM Sgt. "Marine, take out that lightbulb."

IM Pvt. "YES SERGEANT!" <BLAM>

So I guess two Imperial Marines to change a lightbulb?

 

[rancke]

Originally posted by DaddyDragon:
And one I've seen somewhere else, but can't remember where right now...

How many Droyne does it take to change a lightbulb?

Six, it always takes six.

That is one of Mike Metlay's lightbulb jokes. They were published in one of the official magazines. I think it was a TD or a MTJ, but it may have been a Challenge.

Hans

 

[Tobias]

Originally posted by DaddyDragon:
And one I've seen somewhere else, but can't remember where right now...

How many Droyne does it take to change a lightbulb?

Six, it always takes six.

Regards,
Larry

Traveller Lightbulb Jokes, including the ones mentioned here, were collected in an issue of the MegaTraveller Journal by DGP. There are also jokes of this type at Traveller-the silly Era.

Regards,

Tobias

P.S.: Does anybody get this one? Cause I don´t.

Q: How many Vargr does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: YES! (half-barked, half-insane laughter)

 

[far-trader]

Originally posted by Tobias:
<snip>
P.S.: Does anybody get this one? Cause I don´t.

Q: How many Vargr does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: YES! (half-barked, half-insane laughter)[/QB]

Oh yes! Please stop

Sorry, I guess you gotta be or know the Vargr to get it. I'm afraid I can't explain it to a simple pinky, but tell you what, sign up with me for an extended tour through the extants next time I head out and we'll have you howling soon enough

 

[RabidVargr]

LMAO

RV

 

[BigBadRon]

I think this might be from the same source as the Droyne and Vargr ones...

How many Hivers does it take to change a light bulb?

*waggles fingers* Light bulbs? How primitive!