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Old April 1st, 2011, 03:33 PM
NEUniverse NEUniverse is offline
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Default [April Fools 2011]White Wolf to Acquire Traveller License for Worlds of Darkness.

White Wolf to acquire Traveller license from Far Future Enterprises

“Travailer NEUniverse : Worlds of Darkness” to debut in 2011, written by a MAJOR Gaming and internet Traveller critic Developer, critic , and pundit , playtested and developed by the cutting edge designers and theorists of the Forge, the leading cutting edge of the New-wave relevant Indy Gaming movement of today, brought to you by the dark geniuses at White Wolf.

For immediate release.
“Travailer NEUniverse : Worlds of Darkness” joins the cutting edge of relevant gaming ! In a stunningly forwardlooking synergistic enmeshment, Traveller has succeeded in leapfrogging ahead of all competitors such as the 4th D&D by partnering with the forward-looking giants of the Gaming industries experimental avant-garde ! Traveller NEUNIVERSE expands into the dark gritty realm of horror and gothic SF, LARPing, and finally having girls play.

The NEUniverse allows one to recreate the supernatural riffs on traditional SF by a wide variety of popular authors we didn't license, all on rigorously accurate planets with atmospheres that make sense. experience the soul searching angst of playing an alienated and tortured Spacesuited Vampire on an airless rockball, an alienated and tortured Vampire on an earthlike world with a reasonable population and a government that makes sense, or an alienated and tortured vampire on a spaceship of vampires exploring the universe with FTL and STL drives that do not challenge the authors knowlege or imagination, while seeking the elusive Planet of Twilight where Vampires get to stay out all the time because it's around a realistic red dwarf and chase obese, well fed, highly sanguine mundanes and attractive, pale slender isolated members of the Vampires preferred gender orientation whenever they want !

According to the Author and new primary creator of traveler, NEUniverse, Traveler is now
Quote:
“…freed from the shackles of its vast and in-depth background universe, its large and long term loyal fanbase, and the passion and interest of far too many gamers who actually like the classic simplicity of original traveler and its direct descendents. Gone forever will be the basic idea of allowing a broad range of golden age SF tropes to be played out with minimal rules and imagination, and instead, a gritty dark simulationist Blake's 7 sensibility crossed with space first season 1999, before they got the stupid shapechanger and to become capable of emulating all kinds and current tropes and up to the moment scientific speculation passed off as fact as was never intended by its hidebound creators (sic); all enstantiated with rules that remove all of the stupid flights of fancy that are so damaging to those expecting an RPG to provide them with an advanced education in space sciences, and thus contributes to the dulling and dumbing of modern education, while at the same time proving that rigorous scientific accuracy and realism is in fact fun as one travels between lifeless airless rockballs around dull red dwarves across the universe, where vampires rule, because its always twilight around them, especially as the would obviously be tidal locked. ”
Initial release of “Travailer NEUniverse : Worlds of Darkness” is planned for one core book every three to six months, starting off with the three main GM books, each specialized to one of the GNS theoretical domains as adapted for the rigors and challenges of real-world LARP experience, and the shocking and soul searching experience of playing a vampire, a werewolf or another kind of vampire on alien worlds with realistic size to planetary atmosphere ratios. Projected core books to include Travailer (NU): the Gaming , Travailer (NU) : the Simulating (NU). and Travailer(NU): the Narrativeizationing .

Year Two will see the long awaited and eagerly anticipated fifth core book published in three parts, Atmospheres and orbital zones of dark protosystem evolution; Worlds and realistic atmosphere densities of the dark sanguine empire; Planetary size and appropriate stellar classifications of darkly charted space, a reassessment of the effect of the derivation of the Jane’s Escape formula on the long tail of the gas-velocity distribution.

In year three, a four page pamphlet will be released containing all the possible reasonable and sensible social government and planetary types possible. In the NEUniverse, every society will make total sense to its author, with no creative rationalizations or cunning mysteries involving SF tropes from the distant past decade (or worse) ! And possibly something for the playesr to read. Who knows ?

In a statement from his isolated game design compound and fortress somewhere deep in Antarctica, Traveller's creator Marc Miller stated:
Quote:
“At last, I can turn my own hobby into something relevant to today's advanced forward-looking gamers. The franchise is FINALLY in the capable hands of my most vocal critics, something I never though possible throughout the long years of our miscommunication. To their great credit, they finally accepted that my lack of communication with them was simply due to my jealousy of their single minded focus on making traveler so much more than a good game for playing Science Fiction stories with. Obviously FFE will be stopping all further development of any and all Traveller editions, revisions and publications. I owe this all to the memory of my inner circle of handlers and fanboys who perished in the recent crash of the FFE corporate jet, and all the adult entertainers, hollywood stars, gourmet chefs, rock stars and massage therapists that died with them. It was sheerest luck that this proposal was able reach me without their usual vetting of any and all information from the outside world, which differs, I am told, from the 1970’s in some ways.”
Remember ! In the NEUniverse, it only gets more forward-looking !"
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Old April 1st, 2011, 04:13 PM
RandyB RandyB is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NEUniverse View Post
White Wolf to acquire Traveller license from Far Future Enterprises

“Travailer NEUniverse : Worlds of Darkness” to debut in 2011, written by a MAJOR Gaming and internet Traveller critic Developer, critic , and pundit , playtested and developed by the cutting edge designers and theorists of the Forge, the leading cutting edge of the New-wave relevant Indy Gaming movement of today, brought to you by the dark geniuses at White Wolf.

For immediate release.
“Travailer NEUniverse : Worlds of Darkness” joins the cutting edge of relevant gaming ! In a stunningly forwardlooking synergistic enmeshment, Traveller has succeeded in leapfrogging ahead of all competitors such as the 4th D&D by partnering with the forward-looking giants of the Gaming industries experimental avant-garde ! Traveller NEUNIVERSE expands into the dark gritty realm of horror and gothic SF, LARPing, and finally having girls play.

The NEUniverse allows one to recreate the supernatural riffs on traditional SF by a wide variety of popular authors we didn't license, all on rigorously accurate planets with atmospheres that make sense. experience the soul searching angst of playing an alienated and tortured Spacesuited Vampire on an airless rockball, an alienated and tortured Vampire on an earthlike world with a reasonable population and a government that makes sense, or an alienated and tortured vampire on a spaceship of vampires exploring the universe with FTL and STL drives that do not challenge the authors knowlege or imagination, while seeking the elusive Planet of Twilight where Vampires get to stay out all the time because it's around a realistic red dwarf and chase obese, well fed, highly sanguine mundanes and attractive, pale slender isolated members of the Vampires preferred gender orientation whenever they want !

According to the Author and new primary creator of traveler, NEUniverse, Traveler is now


Initial release of “Travailer NEUniverse : Worlds of Darkness” is planned for one core book every three to six months, starting off with the three main GM books, each specialized to one of the GNS theoretical domains as adapted for the rigors and challenges of real-world LARP experience, and the shocking and soul searching experience of playing a vampire, a werewolf or another kind of vampire on alien worlds with realistic size to planetary atmosphere ratios. Projected core books to include Travailer (NU): the Gaming , Travailer (NU) : the Simulating (NU). and Travailer(NU): the Narrativeizationing .

Year Two will see the long awaited and eagerly anticipated fifth core book published in three parts, Atmospheres and orbital zones of dark protosystem evolution; Worlds and realistic atmosphere densities of the dark sanguine empire; Planetary size and appropriate stellar classifications of darkly charted space, a reassessment of the effect of the derivation of the Jane’s Escape formula on the long tail of the gas-velocity distribution.

In year three, a four page pamphlet will be released containing all the possible reasonable and sensible social government and planetary types possible. In the NEUniverse, every society will make total sense to its author, with no creative rationalizations or cunning mysteries involving SF tropes from the distant past decade (or worse) ! And possibly something for the playesr to read. Who knows ?

In a statement from his isolated game design compound and fortress somewhere deep in Antarctica, Traveller's creator Marc Miller stated:


Remember ! In the NEUniverse, it only gets more forward-looking !"
Bravo! Well done!
  #3  
Old April 1st, 2011, 05:21 PM
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It is April 1st.
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Old April 1st, 2011, 07:40 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by far-trader View Post
It is April 1st.
yes it is sure sounds like that matters
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Old April 1st, 2011, 07:42 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by far-trader View Post
It is April 1st.
What's your point, Dan?


Hans
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Old April 1st, 2011, 07:51 PM
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Originally Posted by Rancke2 View Post
What's your point, Dan?


Hans
it loook like a an aprils fools joke
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Old April 1st, 2011, 08:05 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mark Morgan View Post
it loook like a an aprils fools joke
Noooo!!! "Say it ain't so, Joe!"
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Old April 1st, 2011, 08:15 PM
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April Fool's joke?

Haven't you ever felt the urge to play a angsty/bored star-faring adventurer hunting your prey (er... anagathics) from starport to starport, trading ancient relics, staying to the shadows...

Ok, so it wouldn't be that different.

I heard they were working on another supplement for incorporating/converting Vargr, Droyne, Holograms, and Psionicists as Werewolves, Changelings, Wraiths, and Mages.
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Old April 1st, 2011, 10:01 PM
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Can't... stop... giggling...

Wait. I've been missing out on gourmet chefs and massage therapists?? What the--
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Old April 2nd, 2011, 10:15 AM
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Actually until I saw their Mirrors special supplement, I would have endorsed this idea. White Wolf is a solid company and their grounding in EVE would make me think that they could do good things for Traveller. At the very least, one could get illustrations where the Vargr would not look grandpa's hunting hound but something striking fear into the hearts of spacers.

Sadly, their mirrors supplements did not inspire me - it was too soft on the Space Opera side and not dark enough for Cyberpunk side. Mind you, this was them trying to incorporate the WoD into a generic Space Opera and Cyberpunk milieu. And, my WoD is much more dark than what White Wolf has on offer - it is more akin to the world of Kult RPG with some White Wolfy elements but more Lovecraftian.

So, if Traveller could get White Wolf artists then I think we would have a winning product.
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