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Creation Date: March 1st, 2010 07:15 PM
Blue Ghost Blue Ghost is offline
Musings of a Knight of the Imperium.
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In Moot Member Blogs Why my mother screwed with my gaming Entry Tools Rate This Entry
  #595 New September 27th, 2020 08:27 AM
My mother, my biological mother, does not understand science fiction as a whole. She did not, and presumably now, does not understand gaming. I've complained about her in this log in previous entries. This one will be no different.

Things I never got to do in games because of her ignorance, and presumably that of my immediate and extended family;

1) No SFB Campaign. I created rules for operational deployment for a "Space Action Group" for Star Fleet Battles, but because I was being screwed with so much at the time, they came out rather wonky, but otherwise solid; i.e. a lot of fuel consumption and food or provision consumption was based off of the Ship's Systems' Display (SSD). And I created a strategic movement chart from warp 1 to warp 8, which was essentially a geometric progression. Years before I tried to create campaigns for Federation Space or Federation and Empire, or to generate campaigns from those two games. But, time and again, my biological mother contacted my assigned friends and told them to botch the effort.

2) No Car Wars' Campaign; Car Wars is one of my all time favorite games next to Traveller. But all the CW sessions I ever had were one off tournament affairs. I could never get a campaign going, again for the aforementioned reasons in the previous paragraph. The upside is that I was actually able to play Car Wars, and unlike Star Fleet Battles and/or Traveller, my mother and other family saw this as a straight forward "non satanic" game, and so probably let me play it on that basis. But again, no RP campaign ... no matter how much effort I put into it.

2a) It should be noted that I gamed because I liked the fiction. I liked Marc Miller's Third Imperium and other iterations of the Traveller setting, I obvious liked Star Trek and Star Wars and so enjoyed the setting and games and books based off those two fictions. I enjoyed the post apocalyptic world of the Car Wars universe, and ditto with Ogre and all the other games and books I read and enjoyed at the time. Again, it turned me towards a film career with me thinking that I could make high quality visual media on par with Star Wars or Outland or Alien or one of the Trek films, and not crank out botched and idiotic B-movie fare like "Battle Beyond the Stars" (what a f___ing turkey that stinker is). The other reason I played games is because it's what the "smart kids" did. What my biological mother perversely and severely FAILED to understand on a criminal level, is that all those engineers who created computers, satellites, coded software, and today design phones and laptops, at the time, were all GAMERS. THEY ALL PLAYED DUNGEONS AND DRAGONS. THEY ALL WATCHED STAR TREK. This ▮▮▮▮▮▮n b_tch failed to realize this. Further, she failed to realize just how important things like Star Trek were to the popular culture of the time, ergo she labeled it as satanic. It's like you going to Italy and not knowing what ... Pizza is all about. It's like you going to Paris and not knowing about the Lourve or Napoleon. It's like going to Spain and being completely ignorant on Bull Fighting and Franco. It's like going to the UK and not knowing about the Royal family. Seriously and honestly, that's how dumb this b_tch is. And no, I have no problem calling her that in this blog based on what I went through for forty f_cking years, and how I was blamed for it.

3) A one Derek Lenzi told be a Traveller story about how he and his player group hacked up one of the patrons and tried to dispose of the limbs in a garbage disposal. Total BS. Again, another story made up for my benefit of giving up gaming because gaming, Traveller, Star Trek, and everything else, were "satanic". No group I've ever belonged to ever performed such disgusting acts in an imaginary game environment. Ergo, the Traveller group vacillated from year to year, even though the original gang I started the first campaign with enjoyed playing Traveller immensely. Again, they were told to stymie my efforts.

4) Even after 25 years of trying to get a gaming group together to do a campaign, and to tie it in with a flailing media career, when I thought I would join a Babylon 5 Wars campaign, this ▮▮▮▮▮▮n b_tch did it again. All the while my biological father's rival was screwing with my life. And, on top of that, a game designer, who is an alleged "police officer" was the most intrusive and unprofessional human scum bag known to man kind by fundamentally interfering in my career and personal aspirations. This started around 2001 when I did my infamous brake check on southbound 280 a mile or two north of the Stanford Linear Accelerator.

5) I understand now that old 1960's Star Trek is essentially a police-military-hospital show, and that Star Fleet Battles is essentially a kind of tool used to help foster intelligent types to get into tactical war simulations by way of their affection for the TV show. As such each race that was added to the pantheon of races had a new tactical edge to it that exploited some aspect of the game that was unaddressed by the rules. As such a lot of race submissions were probably just outright tossed for not being clever within the rules' frame work. Whatever.

6) I wrote a review about a samurai film by Kurosawa called "RAN", and praised its artistry. But, the morons that are my personal family thought that I loved the bloodshed, the chaos, the misery, the destruction, and all the pain, anguish and violence in the film. My response; no way, and if that's what you think, then you're even dumber than you appear to be. Kurosawa's "RAN" is Shakespeare ported to medieval Japan ... or late medieval Japan when Europe was in its Renaissance period. It's the examination of a merciless old samurai who, now that he's conquered everything through betrayal and killing, thinks that he can retire and enjoy the love of his sons. Sons who watched him kill his closest allies, and learned some of the worst lessons you can ever teach a child, as they themselves become wolf like and hunt their father to gain his wealth and power. Save one who was "loved too much" and turns out to be the only true son the old lord ever had. It's a tragedy so everyone dies. I just thought it was a really great artistic film. But, my dumb ass mother again completely lacked what I and millions of other Kurosawa and film fans enjoyed about the movie.

7) Various games, books, movies, things I enjoyed as a young man, were all essentially dumped on. When I couldn't do my homework I got blamed for it. When I did my upmost to achieve academically but failed, I got blamed for it. And on that line of logic, games got blamed for it. My fake mother channeled my real mother's instructions and at one time said "You spend too much time with games!" Well, in my senior year of high school, after having gone to several tutors, tried studying at libraries, still unable to do my physics' homework or my linear algebra, and having no guidance in how to go into aerospace, I decided to go into film and become a George Lucas. But again, that got "s_it" on too by this woman who didn't understand that I didn't want to make Cleopatra or Gone with the Wind, but something on par with Star Wars, and base my films off of Traveller, Car Wars, Ogre ... what have you. And again, after forty years of torture, I got blamed for it.

I don't play Traveller anymore. Hackers have infested online gaming, so I've uninstalled Age of Empires 2. I'm pretty sure I'm not on the real net, or that a good portion of my net activity goes through a VPN.

There is no amount of money, no amount of "I'm sorry" that can make up for what I went through, even to the point of her personal security harassing me online and possibly on the road.

I'm done with film. I'm sorry to say that I'm done with games. And seeing as how I was sent here to be raised in the US, and only ever got my personal interests dumped on between bouts of getting picked on and blamed for a variety of things, I think I can safely say that I'm done with the United States.
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